Europe · Food · scotland · Uncategorized

The Things Foreigners Say to us Scots 

With dark hair and olive skin, most Italians assume I am one of them, until I open my mouth, they stare for a while, then the inevitable question comes out “where are you from?” 

The land of haggis, Irn bru, William Wallace, where Harry Potter was filmed, the bagpipe playing county… still no? Ok I’m from the UK, Scotland, the Northern country of Great Britian …
“Scotland, that’s near London, right ?

No. No it’s not. London is a city, the capital of England. Which is a whole other country. England is England and Scotland is Scotland. Two different countries guys. 

My face when someone asks me this

“I love your accent, say this, say that, you speak so funny.”

I am not a performing monkey. Thankyou to Taggart ,the Scottish cop show, for making nearly every person I meet on my travels ask me to say “there’s been a murder”. Yes,we say wee for small and the way I say curly wurly is utterly hilarious , we roll our r’s ok, get over it ! What’s even funnier is when people commend me on how good my English is hahah…

“Get that drink down you, you’re Scottish after all!”

Can a girl not nurse a drink, or have a wee Irn bru instead of downing alcoholic drinks. I am a self confessed light weight, one drink and I’m on my arse. This does not impress non Scottish fellow drinkers, it’s like I’ve let down my whole heritage because I’m white girl wasted after a  sniff of Pinot Grigio … 

and No, I don’t drink whiskey. 

Nessie enjoying a wee tipple

“Don’t stab me!”

Aye very good. 

No I’m not going to stab you. 

Yes, Glasgow is safe. No I don’t carry a knife. 

We won’t stab capital of the world once ok, give it a rest. 

Well I might consider it if you ask me if Scotland is in England one more time …

“Omg, I love Edinburg!”

I get it , lots of Scottish towns aren’t spelled phonetically, it can get confusing. Places such as Sauchiehall street, Milngavie, Stranraer, Echlefechan… But c’mon man it’s EDINBURGH pronounced- Edinburuh NOT edinborggggg! Ps I’m from Glasgow and Glasgow is better 😉
“How come you’re not ginger ?”

I am ginger, all Scottish people are of course, we just dye our hair to have an attempt at gaining our own identity…

Just kidding. Not everyone in Scotland is ginger. Infact not many people are. The gingers are in the minority. 

Thanks to the “see you jimmy” tourist hats making everyone think we’re ginger and wear a tartan bunnet. 

“Have you ever eaten a deep fried mars bar?” 

What is the worlds obsession with this? I’m so embarrassed that of all the things people know about Scotland, they know about one chippy deep frying a mars bar. No I haven’t tried it because it sounds and looks absolutely rotten. 

The infamous deep fried mars bar

“Oh you’re from Scotland, do you know a guy called Bob, he’s from Scotland as well.”

Yes. Yes, I know plenty of Bobs, infact if I had a £ for every Scottish Bob I knew i’d be on a beach in the Bahamas right about now. Do I know your brothers,uncles,grandpas,cousins goldfish Bob, No. No I don’t. 

Scotland is a big place , with a lot of people, and a lot of Bobs. And don’t even try to ask me if  know anyone with the surname McDonald…  

“Omg, I love Edinburg!”

“Why aren’t you wearing a kilt?”

1) I’m a woman 2) they’re for special occasions and 3) we have normal clothes shops 

Me in my clan tartan kilt- just kidding, it’s from primark

“Do you guys have TVs, McDonald’s, cars in Scotland?”

Of course we don’t, oh and I live in a castle too, we don’t have houses in Scotland. Just kidding we have all the things you do , although I would love to live in a castle …

“Have you ever seen the Loch Ness Monster?” 

Yeah me and old Nessie go way back, good mates actually, she even poses for photos.Nessie is my class mascot and omg my kids are obsessed, see those lunatics that get like obsessed with conspiracy theories and proving they’re right, this is my class with Nessie! 

An Instagram worthy shot

Considering Scotland is a country of over 5 million people and it’s all I’ve known my whole life, I did expect more people to know where it was and a little more about it. It does give me a giggle I suppose.

What misconceptions do people have about where you’re from? 


15 thoughts on “The Things Foreigners Say to us Scots 

  1. lol Frankie. This made me laugh so hard. Mostly, people assume I’m rude. I really try not to be. The accent thing is usually a HUGE disappointment to literally everyone who finds out. They’re like Where is your accent!? Do I need to sound like Al Pacino? I was once asked if I lived in Central Park–and another time, I was asked if I lived next to the stairs from gossip girl. I always end up hearing about that *one* movie/tv that made someone obsessed with New York with the whole plot recounted to me.


  2. Absolutely love this! Have been victim to all of these during travels. The fun of explaining the differences between England, Great Britain, the United Kingdom and the British Isles never seems to cease!


  3. These are all so accurate it hurts! I swear some people are going to be extremely disappointed if they ever come to Scotland as it’s not even remotely like how they’ve pictured it.
    The “can you say *insert word here*” drives me nuts and it’s usually an English person asking me. I have more of an American accent than a Scottish one so any Scottish slang they want me to say sounds utterly ridiculous.


  4. This was absolutely funny! I can totally relate to you. I am from countries that speak English with different accents, my English doesn’t sound like the standard of what people are exposed to and that throws them off . People always say, “oh you have an accent” Where are you really from? “Or is English your native language”. and I’m like dude ” English is my mother tongue”.hahah but a french guy gave the perfect definition, “you have an international accent”. I liked that definition.
    Talking about country stereotypes, girl I totally relate!. People always think I’m from the middle east. The questions they ask could be out of this world. Also because I’m African as wellthey wonder if Simba was my best friend or something. haha Anyways cheers and great blog!


  5. Haha this is ace! I am almost glad that when people ask where I’m from I can just say London. And yes, of course I know the Queen 😉


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